Tuesday evening blues....

 its cold in here... an endless night of alone-ness stretches out before me and the dog is whining at me for some unholy reason.  I know i forgot to take my meds today. i can feel it.  i can feel worry and panic trying to sneak in.  i hate being by myself on nights like this. at least now i know the morning will be bright and full of love. its just these elastic hours that will stretch on until 8am that kill me.  that leaves a little under 12 hours now... ouch..  but i am doing laundry so for blocks of about 15 minutes every few hours at least I'll be busy.  tomorrow is a parent teacher conference... but i dont remember for who... I'll just have to check my handy dandy Google calender.. and i will as soon as im done here.  tomorrow is also therapy. i hate therapy. there is nothing good about that shit. i always leave feeling tired and worse than when i went in. i know it will get better and i know its good for me, but so is apples and i dont much like them either. tomorrow is also a night that i will not be spending alone... and that makes everything better.